WAR STORIES SHOWDOWN – FINAL SET
Fri, 2008-01-11 16:20
For the last month, sixteen of drag racing’s most colorful
personalities have battled it out within the electronic pages of
Torco’s CompetitionPlus.com in hopes of becoming the inaugural WAR
STORIES SHOWDOWN champion. Sixteen hard-fought battles have whittled
the challenge down to one final match.
Their battles are not of a physical nature or one of performance. This championship is decided by who can tell the best war story. On Monday morning, Scotty Cannon will face off with Roy Hill for the coveted BULL
POO trophy. The BULL POO is the WAR STORIES equivalent to an NHRA Wally or IHRA Iron Man.
How fitting is it that out of the sixteen combatants, who are all accomplished in some form or fashion within drag racing, the championship comes down to two “good ‘ole boys” from the Carolinas?
Their battles are not of a physical nature or one of performance. This championship is decided by who can tell the best war story. On Monday morning, Scotty Cannon will face off with Roy Hill for the coveted BULL
POO trophy. The BULL POO is the WAR STORIES equivalent to an NHRA Wally or IHRA Iron Man.
How fitting is it that out of the sixteen combatants, who are all accomplished in some form or fashion within drag racing, the championship comes down to two “good ‘ole boys” from the Carolinas?
Trust me when we say we’ve heard it all. We’ve heard tales of drunken rental car escapades, grilled dogs, nitrous at match races, the introduction of unknown substances to the tank with unpredictable results and a foreign drag racer that once raced a seasoned veteran from the finish line to the sand-trap at wide open throttle.
These tales aren’t limited to the racers, either. We’ve heard the promoter’s side on tales where the wrong person was transported to the hospital and a motorcycle jumper, who had divine intervention.
Cannon, who carries our version of lane choice into the finals, said that he carried a casual approach into the qualifying portion, but once the stories started to fly, his opinion changed. He likened the experience to strapping into one of his championship Pro Modified entries back in the day.
“You usually get into things like this and take the approach, ‘yeah, whatever,” Cannon said. “But after the first round started, I began to have fun. I found myself walking out of the shop and into the computer to see who was winning and some of the stories being told.
“Now I see Roy Hill and I’ve known him a long time but never got to race him back in the day. I promise you one thing; I intend to whip him like I would have back in the day.”
Cannon was seeded into the fifth position for the 16-storyteller field. He opened the competition with a story about locking his ex-wife in the trailer and driving home from Bristol with her in there. That tale was enough to eliminate Whit Bazemore.
He then told of his antics to embarrass his skeptics in the second round to eliminate Joe Lepone, Jr.
Cannon’s toughest race was in the semi-finals when he met Gary Scelzi, the top vote getter of the event. He pulled no punches, either in the story or the story telling in stopping Scelzi’s tale of RV off-roading.
Now Cannon is up against Roy Hill and Hill promises not only will he not redlight, he's tuned for a monster run.
“For all the readers of Torco’s CompetitionPlus.com that voted for me and voted for all of us, they have something coming on Monday that is going to be great,” Hill said. “Whether I win or not, this is something
that I consider one of my finest accomplishments. I’m paired up against one of the toughest there is in Scotty Cannon.
“We’ve had a lot of fun, Scotty and me, but the one I’m bringing out for him is going to be a shocker. It will be worth reading.”
Hill for his part was more than entertaining. He was greatly censored by race promoters, but entertaining, nonetheless.
Hill opened by winning the closest match of the event, a 366 – 360 decision over Shirley Muldowney. He used the tale of serving as a hitman for the Petty Family in a match race against Bill “Grumpy” Jenkins.
Proof that you can never turn your back on an old dog, Hill also snagged the Pettys in his second round story that made mincemeat of Don Schumacher’s efforts. After reading that tale, chances are you’ll never
eat at another Hill-hosted barbeque.
In a battle of the former Pro Stock racers, Hill took out a hammer-wielding Bob Glidden during the semis-finals. Listening to Hill’s story about channel locks and an unlucky counterfeiter’s tongue still gives us the willies.
We urge you to prepare for this monumental survival of the fittest battle. The coveted BULL POO Award is waiting for the winner.
Man, we can’t wait for the 2nd annual.
1ST ROUND
#16 Aaron Polburn def. #1 John Force
#8 Gary Scelzi def. #9 Larry Morgan
#13 Joe Lepone, Jr. def. #4 Don Prudhomme
#5 Scotty Cannon def. #7 Whit Bazemore
#10 “Animal” Jim Fuerer def. #7 Pat Musi
#2 Bob Glidden def. #15 Steve Earwood
#14 Don Schumacher def. #3 Tom McEwen
#11 Roy Hill def. #6 Shirley Muldowney
QUARTER-FINALS
Scelzi def. Polburn
Cannon def. Lepone
Glidden def. Fuerer
Hill def. Schumacher
SEMI-FINALS
Cannon def. Scelzi
Hill def. Glidden
FINALS
Cannon versus Hill, Monday, January 14, 2008
Their battles are not of a physical nature or one of performance. This championship is decided by who can tell the best war story. On Monday morning, Scotty Cannon will face off with Roy Hill for the coveted BULL
POO trophy. The BULL POO is the WAR STORIES equivalent to an NHRA Wally or IHRA Iron Man.
How fitting is it that out of the sixteen combatants, who are all accomplished in some form or fashion within drag racing, the championship comes down to two “good ‘ole boys” from the Carolinas?
Their battles are not of a physical nature or one of performance. This championship is decided by who can tell the best war story. On Monday morning, Scotty Cannon will face off with Roy Hill for the coveted BULL
POO trophy. The BULL POO is the WAR STORIES equivalent to an NHRA Wally or IHRA Iron Man.
How fitting is it that out of the sixteen combatants, who are all accomplished in some form or fashion within drag racing, the championship comes down to two “good ‘ole boys” from the Carolinas?
Trust me when we say we’ve heard it all. We’ve heard tales of drunken rental car escapades, grilled dogs, nitrous at match races, the introduction of unknown substances to the tank with unpredictable results and a foreign drag racer that once raced a seasoned veteran from the finish line to the sand-trap at wide open throttle.
These tales aren’t limited to the racers, either. We’ve heard the promoter’s side on tales where the wrong person was transported to the hospital and a motorcycle jumper, who had divine intervention.
Cannon, who carries our version of lane choice into the finals, said that he carried a casual approach into the qualifying portion, but once the stories started to fly, his opinion changed. He likened the experience to strapping into one of his championship Pro Modified entries back in the day.
“You usually get into things like this and take the approach, ‘yeah, whatever,” Cannon said. “But after the first round started, I began to have fun. I found myself walking out of the shop and into the computer to see who was winning and some of the stories being told.
“Now I see Roy Hill and I’ve known him a long time but never got to race him back in the day. I promise you one thing; I intend to whip him like I would have back in the day.”
Cannon was seeded into the fifth position for the 16-storyteller field. He opened the competition with a story about locking his ex-wife in the trailer and driving home from Bristol with her in there. That tale was enough to eliminate Whit Bazemore.
He then told of his antics to embarrass his skeptics in the second round to eliminate Joe Lepone, Jr.
Cannon’s toughest race was in the semi-finals when he met Gary Scelzi, the top vote getter of the event. He pulled no punches, either in the story or the story telling in stopping Scelzi’s tale of RV off-roading.
Now Cannon is up against Roy Hill and Hill promises not only will he not redlight, he's tuned for a monster run.
“For all the readers of Torco’s CompetitionPlus.com that voted for me and voted for all of us, they have something coming on Monday that is going to be great,” Hill said. “Whether I win or not, this is something that I consider one of my finest accomplishments. I’m paired up against one of the toughest there is in Scotty Cannon.
“We’ve had a lot of fun, Scotty and me, but the one I’m bringing out for him is going to be a shocker. It will be worth reading.”
Hill for his part was more than entertaining. He was greatly censored by race promoters, but entertaining, nonetheless.
Hill opened by winning the closest match of the event, a 366 – 360 decision over Shirley Muldowney. He used the tale of serving as a hitman for the Petty Family in a match race against Bill “Grumpy” Jenkins.
Proof that you can never turn your back on an old dog, Hill also snagged the Pettys in his second round story that made mincemeat of Don Schumacher’s efforts. After reading that tale, chances are you’ll never
eat at another Hill-hosted barbeque.
In a battle of the former Pro Stock racers, Hill took out a hammer-wielding Bob Glidden during the semis-finals. Listening to Hill’s story about channel locks and an unlucky counterfeiter’s tongue still gives us the willies.
We urge you to prepare for this monumental survival of the fittest battle. The coveted BULL POO Award is waiting for the winner.
Man, we can’t wait for the 2nd annual.
1ST ROUND
#16 Aaron Polburn def. #1 John Force
#8 Gary Scelzi def. #9 Larry Morgan
#13 Joe Lepone, Jr. def. #4 Don Prudhomme
#5 Scotty Cannon def. #7 Whit Bazemore
#10 “Animal” Jim Fuerer def. #7 Pat Musi
#2 Bob Glidden def. #15 Steve Earwood
#14 Don Schumacher def. #3 Tom McEwen
#11 Roy Hill def. #6 Shirley Muldowney
QUARTER-FINALS
Scelzi def. Polburn
Cannon def. Lepone
Glidden def. Fuerer
Hill def. Schumacher
SEMI-FINALS
Cannon def. Scelzi
Hill def. Glidden
FINALS
Cannon versus Hill, Monday, January 14, 2008
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